Saturday, July 16, 2011

I Need an 'Adjustment'

So I was musing tonight as I washed my make-up off and put on my night creams. I was musing because we had just watched 'The Adjustment Bureau', and it really struck a chord. I thought to myself that we had been married forever, (well, maybe not forever, but 41 years is a really long time), and I tried to remember what I expected when we said our vows. What on earth was I thinking back then? What was he thinking? What was supposed to happen to us, with us, for us, against us?

I have a great life. I have always had a good life, but it morphed into a great one. I am married to the best guy on the planet. I am able to be at home (which I love) and craft when I feel like it (which I also love). I don't have to cook if I don't want to--my guy does a great job of that. Or we eat out. A lot. I get help with the vacuuming, since it hurts my back. I live in a beautiful house, far nicer than I would have ever expected, and I drive a nice car. I have a sweet little dog, tons of books to read, any gadget my little heart desires, nice clothes to wear, a fun shoe collection, any make-up and skin care that I like, and the list goes on and on and on. How in the hell did I get so lucky? Why me?

When Gary asked me to marry him, back in 1970, I jumped at the chance! I had not expected to marry so young (I wasn't quite 21),  and I had not planned to marry so young. I thought I would finish college, get a job, and then find a man. So why did I tie myself to Gary's life at that time? And what did I see for our future?

In the spring of 1970 he had just gotten back from Viet Nam. He was still in the Army, making no money. Really. No money. He had a high school education, a beat-up VW, an empty wallet, and no plans for the future. But he wanted me in it. And I wanted to be in it, too, whatever it turned out to be. I certainly had no idea what our future would bring. I blindly moved to Georgia with him, to Ft. Benning from hell, and had no idea where we would go from there.

We were so poor, thanks to the military salaries then, (and they probably aren't much better now). We couldn't make it from one payday to the next without taking Gary's zoom lens to the pawn shop for a loan each month. We fought a lot while we were adjusting to being married. His mother told mine that we wouldn't last due to his temper.  Little did she know that my temper was at least as bad, if not worse. But somehow we managed to get through the worst of the financial and emotional turmoil. I think it helped when Gary decided to get out of the Army and go back to college. Suddenly we had a direction for our future. And what a future it turned out to be.

Look at how spoiled I am now. I know it. I am not blind. But this is hardly where I expected to be 41 years ago. I just had no idea. So did the cosmos plan this for us? Or did we blindly stumble into it? I have a need to know, thanks to 'The Adjustment Bureau'. I don't know if I could recommend this movie to you. It might make you start musing...

A few photos of my Gary in Oregon last week:

I am wishing everyone everywhere a superb Sunday!


  1. What a great post, Mom. I really enjoyed reading about you and Dad in the early days. This is something you should scrapbook or journal! Or maybe I'll steal it and use it for a page about you guys in *my* scrapbook. :)

  2. Thanks! I think everyone enjoys hearing about their parents' lives. Perhaps I will blog more about that sometime. Feel free to use this. :^)

  3. Feel free to use this. :^) Thanks!


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Hugs, Penny